10 Lessons from March
- Jack Fleming
- Mar 25
- 4 min read
Some notes from my last month. Life advice is very interesting, you never know when something you listened to or wrote down is going to be relevant.
One of my favourite things to do is sit at a coffee shop in the early hours of the morning with my notebook and write, and this is a summation of the advice that kept showing up.
"Learn to listen to your values, your intuition and your nervous system." - Yung Pueblo
The logic in my left hemisphere wants me to turn everything into a list, and a mental model.
Does what I am doing align with my values?
Maybe sometimes all you need to ask is, does this feel right?
You have to make important decisions based on how you feel, not on your logic.
4 Competencies as a Leader to Learn - Diana Chapman
Self Awareness - do you know what your strengths are and how to leverage them? What your weaknesses are?
Learning Agility - how do you manoeuvre the ever-changing world of knowledge?
Communication - what do you need to improve as a speaker, listener or writer?
Influence - what does it look like for you? There is no recipe.
The Simple No
If it's something I don't want to do, a simple no without explanation leaves no room for manipulation.
Thank you 'and' - Thank you and no. There's never a but.
'If I change my mind about this I'll let you know.' The more words you add after that, the more entangled you get.
You do not owe anybody an explanation.
Self blame is as toxic as blaming others.
There is a difference between radical responsibility and self blame. You may be stuck in the 'Drama Triangle' - as you see below.
"Sit with curiosity and ask - what are you just a little bit interested in?" - Liz Gilbert
Seeing somebody who you deeply respect live, creates a visceral response and is worth every dollar. Her deep presence and capacity to connect with the audience was aspirational.
“I am deeply loved, by a power that has given me control over practically nothing. I have very little control, and so much love. So I just focus on the love and not the control.” - Byron Katie
When injustice and questions of immorality are occurring around you, there are many things you want to control. To direct your attention on the love, may help take some weight off your back. To live in harmony with the way things are - what a superpower.
"Hard and fast. How we want to start our game, how we start every drill." - Craig Bellamy
One of the greatest coaches in sport, such beauty in the simplicity.
The best closeout is no closeout.
Time of pass, move your ass.
Maybe the question you need right now is how do we reduce closeouts in our defence, not how do we get better at them?
"The worst thing in the world is being on a good path, that isn’t yours." - Sahlil Bloom
How do you know what is your path? Well isn't that the big question. I don't know, but I know it's important to keep asking, keep listening and keep chasing your curiosity.
Sometimes you have to be willing to let go of your willingness, and be in a state of surrender.
Maybe your world needs you to sit with the discomfort and be with it. A mature understanding of when to use your will, and when to simply do nothing.
I am thinking about the capacity to not necessarily solve every problem, but to be at peace with certain storms and know when to let them pass.
Banksy What even did I just write?
When I read back what I have just written - I feel a bittersweet sense of being, a seesaw of joy and sorrow. There is a melancholic temperament to the words within the page, that unlocks my further understanding of the interplay between dark and light. Somewhere at the core of creativity, requires a deep attunement to the spectrum of emotions within you.
When you put that out into the world, the bigger questions start to bubble. Will people think that you are a negative, ungrateful asshole? For 2 days I have sat on this piece of writing. The inner feeling of what will people think of me, really lies at the core of my own insecurity.
Why would you talk about anything but your zone of competence? Just stay in your lane about basketball. But what ever you get paid attention for, is never what you think is most important about yourself.
Most importantly what the really great artists do, they're entirely themselves. They've got their own vision, no institutionalised filter, their own way of fracturing reality and if it's authentic you will feel it in your core.
One day.
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